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Be Patient with One
Another
Ephesians 4:1-8
Friday while
driving to Birmingham I was scrolling through the radio stations and
happened on a talk radio show that caught my attention. The guy was
discussion the state of the world in which we live in and how it seems
that the end must be coming near. Natural disasters like Katrina and
Rita then the Earthquake in Pakistan have left tens of thousands without
homes and they are still trying to count the dead.
And then there is the new or new again health concern about the Asian
Bird Flu, and the Center of Disease Control’s struggle to come up with a
vaccine before the flu even arrives.
Now I am not one of those who believe that times now are worse than
they've ever been.
If you remember, things were so bad in Noah's day that God almost
decided to just start over.
In the first century times were so bad that people were buying tickets
to the arena to see Christians killed and mauled by the lions.
While we struggle with the Asian Bird Flu and West Nile these days, it
is not as bad as the Bubonic plague broke out in the 6th, 14th, and 17th
centuries. The death toll was 137 million victims.
Then in the 1930s, millions of Americans lost all they had, thousands
went to bed hungry each night as a result of the droughts that brought
about Dust Bowls.
Then in the 1940s, a mad man threatened to take over the world and very
nearly succeeded. He killed millions in the process.
Don’t forget about the 1960s and the deadly riots that happened in Watts
all across our nation.
And we haven’t even touched on the other Hurricanes like Opal, Andrew,
and Camille; or the Y2K Bug, or even the Ethiopian famine from the
1980s.
So when people tell me these are the darkest days humans have ever
known, I refer them to history. But I am going to have to admit that
when it comes to putting the virtue of patience into practice, I'm
forced to join the doomsayers. I believe it is harder now than it has
ever been to be patient.
I did a little research this week and I believe that I have figured out
when our patience problem started.
It seems to have started in October 1959 when Jiffy Pop popcorn made its
fist appearance. And by the summer of 1960 we as a nation were hooked.
Are you having a hard time following my logic and seeing how Jiffy Pop
and our lack of patience go together? Well let me explain.
Before Jiffy Pop everything we did took time. You see Jiffy Pop was the
first convenience food. Instead of taking the time to get the pan that
you were going to use, measure the right amount of oil, and the right
amount of seed. Then you waited for the oil to heat up enough to cause
that magic moment when the seed explodes and you are offered a wonderful
treat.
But on that fateful day in 1959 you could go to the store pick up a
little tinfoil pan and stick it in he drawer. When you wanted Pop Corn
you just put the pan on the stove and shake it for 3 minutes and the
house filled with the marvelous aroma of freshly popped, heavily
buttered popcorn, and your belly was filled with Popcorn in a Jiffy.
It was then that I believe that we Americans began to be seduced by the
possibility of the instant. Next thing you know we were crossing the
Atlantic in a supersonic jet faster than you good get a good night
sleep. The interstate highway cut a trip into half the time and we could
get anywhere in record time.
Then came the microwave oven, instant oatmeal and coffee, and TV
dinners. Now we get our news as it happens. The morning headlines are
already old by lunch time. We won't settle for anything less than
real-time stock quotes. Waiting for anything has become not just an
inconvenience; it has become a cultural sin. We are addicted to the
immediate.
Now immediate isn’t always a bad thing. If you or a loved one is in the
middle of a medical emergency, immediate care is a very good thing. You
see it’s not the speed of life that is wrong I think the problem comes
when our addiction to immediacy spills over into our relationships with
other people.
If there is something that we believe needs to be changed in our
relationships we get the courage to bring it up and talk about it and if
the change doesn’t happen immediately we get frustrated with the other
person.
You ask your husband to show more affection, you ask your wife to give
you a little personal time so that you can get your bearings, you ask
your children to be respectful and 15 minutes later when you walk into
Wal-Mart and he doesn’t grab your hand, or you are outside enjoying the
silence and she comes out and asks you what your thinking, or the kids
are bouncing off the walls you throw up your hands and say something
like, "Things will never change."
Well, they may not. Or it may be that you need to give that person a
little more than 24 hours to change a pattern of behavior that took
decades to develop. You know it takes a long time to turn around a
battleship.
And we do it with our siblings, our co-workers, even strangers in
traffic. I don't have any scientific or sociological studies to back it
up, but I'll bet there's a correlation between Jiffy Pop popcorn and
road rage. It’s just harder to be patient than it ever has been.
Well that’s your lengthy introduction let’s get to the lesson. Turn your
Bibles to Ephesians 4:1-8 and let’s read this together.
Read Text
In the middle of this beautiful book Paul takes some time to talk about
the unity that is to exist in the Body of Christ. Normally when I turn
to this passage I focus on verses 4-8 one body, one Spirit, one hope,
one Lord, one faith, one baptism… But today I want you to look again at
verse 2 where Paul says that we have been called with patience to bear
with one another.
Bearing with one another in patience or being patient with one another.
That’s a tall order in a Jiffy Pop world.
Patience is Difficult to Develop
Well, as desirable as patience may be it is not easy to develop. I think
developing patience is difficult because it goes against human nature.
We aren’t born patient, are we?
When a baby wakes up in the middle of the night & is hungry, or its
diaper is wet, it doesn’t lie there & think, "I know Mom & Dad are
tired. So I’ll just wait until a more convenient time to let them know
that I need something to eat or my diaper changed." Not my boys! They
would cry impatiently & continue to cry until we got up and checked on
them.
And now that we are out of the Baby stage it hasn’t gotten much better.
On Thursday Trista took the boys down to Bay Minette and Trafton was in
the back of the truck asking the same question over and over again.
"When are we going to get there? When are we going to get there?"
About Greenville, Trista said she had enough and said that they will be
there in about an hour, and told Trafton to do anything else but ask her
when they were going to get there. Trafton was quiet for 5 minutes and
then asked, "Mom, will I still be four when we get there?"
Now here’s a second reason why developing patience is difficult. It’s
because there are weeds of pride, selfishness & anger that can choke out
patience.
You can see the effects of our pride and anger at work, in schools, and
on the highways.
A man’s car stalled in heavy traffic just as the light turned green. All
his frantic efforts to get the car started failed, & a chorus of honking
horns behind him made matters worse. He finally got out of his car &
walked back to the first driver behind him & said, "I’m sorry, but I
can’t seem to get my car started. If you’ll go up there & give it a try,
I’ll stay here & honk your horn for you."
Thirdly, patience is difficult to develop because it’s contrary to our
culture.
Our culture is anything but relaxed. We’re on a fast track, & in a rat
race. We’re in a world of fast food & quick print & expressways &
10-minute oil changes & instant cameras & microwaves.
There is even a church in Florida that advertises 22-minute services. Go
there & they promise that in 22 minutes it will all be over, & you’ll be
out of there. The sermons are only 8 minutes long. Now don’t get your
hopes up. It’s not going to happen here.
I think another reason that patience is difficult to develop is because
we have convinced ourselves that impatience is a virtue.
So you hear people say, "Well, I may be impatient, but I get things
done." We like "type A" personalities, hard-charging people who get
things done, & somehow impatience is seen as a virtue.
But listen to the Bible. Proverbs 14:29 says, "A patient man has great
understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly."
Proverbs 15:18 says, "A hot-tempered man stirs up dissension, but a
patient man calms a quarrel."
We forget that the real virtue is Patience. And again & again the Bible
teaches us that we need to develop this virtue in our lives.
So How do we Develop Patience?
If patience is so important how do we cultivate it in our lives? Let me
give you 4 suggestions.
The first suggestion is "Abide in Christ."
Jesus, in John 15:5 says, "I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man
abides in me & I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can
do nothing."
We can only live the life that God desires by receiving the nourishment
that only Jesus Christ can give. We cannot be patience unless we’re
abiding in Christ, unless we’re walking in His steps, unless we’re
reading His Word, unless we’re growing in our prayer life, unless we’re
spending quality time worshiping & fellowshipping with brothers &
sisters in Christ.
Now I know in church when I say this we all shake our heads yes and
think boy he’s right that’s what we need to do. But how committed are
you when you leave this building? If you and I are not in the word, if
we are not meditating on the Word, if we are not spending time in prayer
we cannot have Patience.
Secondly we can slow down.
I have always though it was funny that the largest fast food chain in
the world used to have as their slogan "You deserve a break today" But
in this world the break can only last 10 minutes as you get in woof down
a Big Mac and fries and get back out in the rat race.
In Exodus 20:8 we see that the Lord came up with the idea of a Sabbath
day - a day to worship & rest. Our bodies need it, our minds need it,
our spirits need it. We need time just to sit & reflect on God & what
He’s doing, & absorb His teaching. So take a walk. Spend some time in
the park. Watch children play, & listen to birds sing. Read a book.
Plant a flower & watch it grow. Just some time to relax.
Thirdly, we need to overlook the little frustrations of life.
There is a book that topped the Best Seller lists called “Don’t Sweat
the Small Stuff, and It’s All Small Stuff’"
Whether you read the book or not is not the point as much as I hope that
we just pay attention to the title. Don’t sweat the small stuff, that’s
a good lesson for all of us to learn.
But what about the big things that we’re just not capable of dealing
with? What do you do when the big stuff comes along? What do you do when
you go to the doctor & he tells you that you have a serious illness?
What do you do when you lose your job? What do you do when your children
disappoint you? Or your spouse leaves, & life is empty? What do you do?
The Bible says that there are some things that we just can’t handle on
our own, & that we’ll never be able to handle them without the Lord’s
help.
There is a beautiful illustration of this in the 14th chapter of the
Book of Exodus. Moses has led the children of Israel out of Egyptian
bondage & they are standing on the bank of the Red Sea. Before them is
this great body of water. Behind them they hear the hoof beats & the
chariot wheels of Pharaoh’s army. They are caught between a sea & an
army. What do you do in a situation like that?
They turned & cried out to Moses, "Moses weren’t there enough graves in
Egypt? You led us all the way out here to die in this God-forsaken
place." Then Moses speaks in vs. 13, "Do not be afraid. Stand firm & you
will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians
you see today you will never see again."
Now listen to vs. 14, it’s such an important verse. Moses said, "The
Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still."
So it’s critical that we be still & wait on the Lord when it comes to
the big stuff because our God can handle it.
Finally follow Christ’s example of patience
In the 26th chapter of Matthew we see Jesus coming to the Garden of
Gethsemane. Leaving the rest of the disciples by the gate, He takes
Peter, James, & John with Him into the inner recesses of the garden, &
says to them, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death.
Stay here & keep watch with me" [Matthew 26:38].
Then Jesus went on a little farther by Himself & prayed. Luke 22:44
says, "And being in anguish, He prayed more earnestly; & His sweat was
like drops of blood falling to the ground."
Then when Jesus came back, He found Peter & James & John sound asleep.
Now how would you react to that? Here Jesus was experiencing the most
terrible night of His life upon this earth, & they fall asleep, not
once, but 3 times.
So how does Jesus treat them? Does he yell and scream? Does he give them
all leprosy? Does He tell them that they are no longer worthy to be his
disciples? No Jesus treats them with love & patience & kindness. Because
that is His nature.
2 Peter 3:9 says, "The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some
understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to
perish, but everyone to come to repentance."
Have you ever stopped & wondered why God hasn’t intervened? Why doesn’t
God send a lightning bolt? Why doesn’t He intervene when injustice seems
to run rampant?
That’s because God is patient & He wants everybody to be saved. Every
day that He waits is just one more day for people to repent & come to
Him.
If you have not come to Jesus, one of the reasons He may be holding back
His judgment is because you haven’t come, & you’re His child. And more
than anything, He wants you to come to Him, too.
The door of salvation is open because the Lord is patient. The door to
Jesus is open because the Lord is patient. Right now, the opportunity
for us to be saved from our sins is still available, because the Lord is
patient.
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