One Another

 

07/29/08

 

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Be Patient with One Another

Ephesians 4:1-8     


Friday while driving to Birmingham I was scrolling through the radio stations and happened on a talk radio show that caught my attention. The guy was discussion the state of the world in which we live in and how it seems that the end must be coming near. Natural disasters like Katrina and Rita then the Earthquake in Pakistan have left tens of thousands without homes and they are still trying to count the dead.

And then there is the new or new again health concern about the Asian Bird Flu, and the Center of Disease Control’s struggle to come up with a vaccine before the flu even arrives.

Now I am not one of those who believe that times now are worse than they've ever been.

If you remember, things were so bad in Noah's day that God almost decided to just start over.

In the first century times were so bad that people were buying tickets to the arena to see Christians killed and mauled by the lions.

While we struggle with the Asian Bird Flu and West Nile these days, it is not as bad as the Bubonic plague broke out in the 6th, 14th, and 17th centuries. The death toll was 137 million victims.

Then in the 1930s, millions of Americans lost all they had, thousands went to bed hungry each night as a result of the droughts that brought about Dust Bowls.

Then in the 1940s, a mad man threatened to take over the world and very nearly succeeded. He killed millions in the process.

Don’t forget about the 1960s and the deadly riots that happened in Watts all across our nation.

And we haven’t even touched on the other Hurricanes like Opal, Andrew, and Camille; or the Y2K Bug, or even the Ethiopian famine from the 1980s.

So when people tell me these are the darkest days humans have ever known, I refer them to history. But I am going to have to admit that when it comes to putting the virtue of patience into practice, I'm forced to join the doomsayers. I believe it is harder now than it has ever been to be patient.

I did a little research this week and I believe that I have figured out when our patience problem started.

It seems to have started in October 1959 when Jiffy Pop popcorn made its fist appearance. And by the summer of 1960 we as a nation were hooked. Are you having a hard time following my logic and seeing how Jiffy Pop and our lack of patience go together? Well let me explain.

Before Jiffy Pop everything we did took time. You see Jiffy Pop was the first convenience food. Instead of taking the time to get the pan that you were going to use, measure the right amount of oil, and the right amount of seed. Then you waited for the oil to heat up enough to cause that magic moment when the seed explodes and you are offered a wonderful treat.

But on that fateful day in 1959 you could go to the store pick up a little tinfoil pan and stick it in he drawer. When you wanted Pop Corn you just put the pan on the stove and shake it for 3 minutes and the house filled with the marvelous aroma of freshly popped, heavily buttered popcorn, and your belly was filled with Popcorn in a Jiffy.

It was then that I believe that we Americans began to be seduced by the possibility of the instant. Next thing you know we were crossing the Atlantic in a supersonic jet faster than you good get a good night sleep. The interstate highway cut a trip into half the time and we could get anywhere in record time.

Then came the microwave oven, instant oatmeal and coffee, and TV dinners. Now we get our news as it happens. The morning headlines are already old by lunch time. We won't settle for anything less than real-time stock quotes. Waiting for anything has become not just an inconvenience; it has become a cultural sin. We are addicted to the immediate.

Now immediate isn’t always a bad thing. If you or a loved one is in the middle of a medical emergency, immediate care is a very good thing. You see it’s not the speed of life that is wrong I think the problem comes when our addiction to immediacy spills over into our relationships with other people.

If there is something that we believe needs to be changed in our relationships we get the courage to bring it up and talk about it and if the change doesn’t happen immediately we get frustrated with the other person.

You ask your husband to show more affection, you ask your wife to give you a little personal time so that you can get your bearings, you ask your children to be respectful and 15 minutes later when you walk into Wal-Mart and he doesn’t grab your hand, or you are outside enjoying the silence and she comes out and asks you what your thinking, or the kids are bouncing off the walls you throw up your hands and say something like, "Things will never change."

Well, they may not. Or it may be that you need to give that person a little more than 24 hours to change a pattern of behavior that took decades to develop. You know it takes a long time to turn around a battleship.

And we do it with our siblings, our co-workers, even strangers in traffic. I don't have any scientific or sociological studies to back it up, but I'll bet there's a correlation between Jiffy Pop popcorn and road rage. It’s just harder to be patient than it ever has been.

Well that’s your lengthy introduction let’s get to the lesson. Turn your Bibles to Ephesians 4:1-8 and let’s read this together.

Read Text

In the middle of this beautiful book Paul takes some time to talk about the unity that is to exist in the Body of Christ. Normally when I turn to this passage I focus on verses 4-8 one body, one Spirit, one hope, one Lord, one faith, one baptism… But today I want you to look again at verse 2 where Paul says that we have been called with patience to bear with one another.

Bearing with one another in patience or being patient with one another. That’s a tall order in a Jiffy Pop world.

Patience is Difficult to Develop

Well, as desirable as patience may be it is not easy to develop. I think developing patience is difficult because it goes against human nature. We aren’t born patient, are we?

When a baby wakes up in the middle of the night & is hungry, or its diaper is wet, it doesn’t lie there & think, "I know Mom & Dad are tired. So I’ll just wait until a more convenient time to let them know that I need something to eat or my diaper changed." Not my boys! They would cry impatiently & continue to cry until we got up and checked on them.

And now that we are out of the Baby stage it hasn’t gotten much better. On Thursday Trista took the boys down to Bay Minette and Trafton was in the back of the truck asking the same question over and over again. "When are we going to get there? When are we going to get there?"

About Greenville, Trista said she had enough and said that they will be there in about an hour, and told Trafton to do anything else but ask her when they were going to get there. Trafton was quiet for 5 minutes and then asked, "Mom, will I still be four when we get there?"

Now here’s a second reason why developing patience is difficult. It’s because there are weeds of pride, selfishness & anger that can choke out patience.

You can see the effects of our pride and anger at work, in schools, and on the highways.

A man’s car stalled in heavy traffic just as the light turned green. All his frantic efforts to get the car started failed, & a chorus of honking horns behind him made matters worse. He finally got out of his car & walked back to the first driver behind him & said, "I’m sorry, but I can’t seem to get my car started. If you’ll go up there & give it a try, I’ll stay here & honk your horn for you."

Thirdly, patience is difficult to develop because it’s contrary to our culture.

Our culture is anything but relaxed. We’re on a fast track, & in a rat race. We’re in a world of fast food & quick print & expressways & 10-minute oil changes & instant cameras & microwaves.

There is even a church in Florida that advertises 22-minute services. Go there & they promise that in 22 minutes it will all be over, & you’ll be out of there. The sermons are only 8 minutes long. Now don’t get your hopes up. It’s not going to happen here.

I think another reason that patience is difficult to develop is because we have convinced ourselves that impatience is a virtue.

So you hear people say, "Well, I may be impatient, but I get things done." We like "type A" personalities, hard-charging people who get things done, & somehow impatience is seen as a virtue.

But listen to the Bible. Proverbs 14:29 says, "A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly."

Proverbs 15:18 says, "A hot-tempered man stirs up dissension, but a patient man calms a quarrel."

We forget that the real virtue is Patience. And again & again the Bible teaches us that we need to develop this virtue in our lives.

So How do we Develop Patience?

If patience is so important how do we cultivate it in our lives? Let me give you 4 suggestions.

The first suggestion is "Abide in Christ."

Jesus, in John 15:5 says, "I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man abides in me & I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing."

We can only live the life that God desires by receiving the nourishment that only Jesus Christ can give. We cannot be patience unless we’re abiding in Christ, unless we’re walking in His steps, unless we’re reading His Word, unless we’re growing in our prayer life, unless we’re spending quality time worshiping & fellowshipping with brothers & sisters in Christ.

Now I know in church when I say this we all shake our heads yes and think boy he’s right that’s what we need to do. But how committed are you when you leave this building? If you and I are not in the word, if we are not meditating on the Word, if we are not spending time in prayer we cannot have Patience.

Secondly we can slow down.

I have always though it was funny that the largest fast food chain in the world used to have as their slogan "You deserve a break today" But in this world the break can only last 10 minutes as you get in woof down a Big Mac and fries and get back out in the rat race.

In Exodus 20:8 we see that the Lord came up with the idea of a Sabbath day - a day to worship & rest. Our bodies need it, our minds need it, our spirits need it. We need time just to sit & reflect on God & what He’s doing, & absorb His teaching. So take a walk. Spend some time in the park. Watch children play, & listen to birds sing. Read a book. Plant a flower & watch it grow. Just some time to relax.

Thirdly, we need to overlook the little frustrations of life.

There is a book that topped the Best Seller lists called “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff, and It’s All Small Stuff’"

Whether you read the book or not is not the point as much as I hope that we just pay attention to the title. Don’t sweat the small stuff, that’s a good lesson for all of us to learn.

But what about the big things that we’re just not capable of dealing with? What do you do when the big stuff comes along? What do you do when you go to the doctor & he tells you that you have a serious illness? What do you do when you lose your job? What do you do when your children disappoint you? Or your spouse leaves, & life is empty? What do you do?

The Bible says that there are some things that we just can’t handle on our own, & that we’ll never be able to handle them without the Lord’s help.

There is a beautiful illustration of this in the 14th chapter of the Book of Exodus. Moses has led the children of Israel out of Egyptian bondage & they are standing on the bank of the Red Sea. Before them is this great body of water. Behind them they hear the hoof beats & the chariot wheels of Pharaoh’s army. They are caught between a sea & an army. What do you do in a situation like that?

They turned & cried out to Moses, "Moses weren’t there enough graves in Egypt? You led us all the way out here to die in this God-forsaken place." Then Moses speaks in vs. 13, "Do not be afraid. Stand firm & you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again."

Now listen to vs. 14, it’s such an important verse. Moses said, "The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still."

So it’s critical that we be still & wait on the Lord when it comes to the big stuff because our God can handle it.

Finally follow Christ’s example of patience

In the 26th chapter of Matthew we see Jesus coming to the Garden of Gethsemane. Leaving the rest of the disciples by the gate, He takes Peter, James, & John with Him into the inner recesses of the garden, & says to them, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here & keep watch with me" [Matthew 26:38].

Then Jesus went on a little farther by Himself & prayed. Luke 22:44 says, "And being in anguish, He prayed more earnestly; & His sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground."

Then when Jesus came back, He found Peter & James & John sound asleep. Now how would you react to that? Here Jesus was experiencing the most terrible night of His life upon this earth, & they fall asleep, not once, but 3 times.

So how does Jesus treat them? Does he yell and scream? Does he give them all leprosy? Does He tell them that they are no longer worthy to be his disciples? No Jesus treats them with love & patience & kindness. Because that is His nature.

2 Peter 3:9 says, "The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance."

Have you ever stopped & wondered why God hasn’t intervened? Why doesn’t God send a lightning bolt? Why doesn’t He intervene when injustice seems to run rampant?

That’s because God is patient & He wants everybody to be saved. Every day that He waits is just one more day for people to repent & come to Him.

If you have not come to Jesus, one of the reasons He may be holding back His judgment is because you haven’t come, & you’re His child. And more than anything, He wants you to come to Him, too.

The door of salvation is open because the Lord is patient. The door to Jesus is open because the Lord is patient. Right now, the opportunity for us to be saved from our sins is still available, because the Lord is patient.